6.10.12

Ying & Yang: In which I get a little personal...

Recently I've been good- by that I mean, I've felt good about mysel. I've felt happy about life in general. I've been grateful for all life has given me. I've decided worrying and anger only hurts yourself.
I haven't felt like this in a long time, let alone for long periods of time.

I discovered it takes a lot more effort keeping up the "I feel like shit, I need someone to console me" gig than letting myself enjoy every day and moment. It's so easy to let the light in- even if you are in the lowest of lows. Just know it's there. And you can let it in, little by little.


Source: swiss-miss.com via Mariana on Pinterest





[Marc Johns illustration*]
Guys, it is so much easier being happy. Just being.
Being yourself.

That's not to say shit happens. Because it can and it does...

Yesterday I was a little too high on positivity that my concentration was not where it needed to be.
Needless to say, I crashed the front of my car on a sidewalk and a tree stump.
I did not realise I set the gear on Drive, when I needed it to be on Reverse- and being affected by my overall frenetic state, I didn't hesitate in pushing the gas pedal.
No, I wasn't drunk. I hadn't had a drop of alcohol.
I don't know what it was, but I screwed up pretty badly.

I immediately felt awful, naturally, but realised (in retrospect) that most of my mortifiation came from "What will those who saw me hit the sidewalk think of me?!" Whenever I asked myself that question, I would cringe.**

After I realised what was happening, I had to stop myself and say:
"Hey. It's okay. You're not perfect."**
Everyone screws up.
Let's not forget to be grateful.

It's silly to look back on things and see how you're affected most by judging youself through other people's eyes***, instead of letting yourself be and grow. Learn.
Happiness is a warm gun (bang bang shoot shoot) is anyone and anything at all that's loved by you.



And lesson proved: no matter how bad things may be or can get, it will get better.
Maybe not immediately, but it will.

Just don't be so hard on yourself.


* One of my favourite illustrators! 
** And this is not to say that crashing your car into things is okay either.
*** Speaking for myself here. 

6 comments:

  1. That is great news, Mariana! And I love that you wrote such an inspiring post about it.

    This past year I've been working on being as positive as possible too:D

    I read somewhere that your reaction to things is pretty much all that matters and I've kept that in mind ever since.

    Will check out the illustrator as well!

    blueeyednightowl.blogspot.com/

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    1. Thanks!
      Yeah- reaction really is important, I think.
      All it takes is the effort to think positively, and you're already on the right track :)

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  2. awww, i'm glad you've been feeling this way! it's always much better to walk around with a smile :D
    thank you for the reminder, it's always useful :)

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    1. Right? :) A smile really goes a long way!

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  3. I love this! Well not that you crashed (so sorry about that) but that you are taking on a positive perspective. I think perspective is everything, and I too feel that being pessimistic or negative (which we all can be) is much more draining and truly a waste of time. That's not to say that we don't need those down moments, but as you say, it will get better in time! :)

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    1. I agree- it's okay to feel (and let yourself feel) sad, but you just have to know when enough is enough and get over things. I mean, any sort of grievance or sadness is only human.
      Positivity has really changed my outlook on many things :)

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